Sunday, 2 May 2010

TMA05 commentary and lifewriting (ouch, again)

Well, TMA05 sorted itself out nicely after a bit of bashing into shape and taking out all the adjectives (I wrote the first draft a while ago). I allow myself one per paragraph, tops. My problem is the navel gazing required for the commentary.

I chose a magazine (I started out looking for myslexia but it's intimidatingly good and I chickened out). I ended up with Riptide, because I have seen one once and it looked good but not so far above my head I didn't understand any of it. Anyway, it also has a whole page on recommendations for submissions so something to write about in the commentary. My problem is, I'm not sure how much should be about tracking down the mag and how much about how I wrote the short story?

One unexpected side effect is that I'm now quite keen to submit it to a magazine, to see what happens, as well as working on a competition entry I've been fiddling with for Writing Magazine. I know it's a good story but I'm still not sure my writing suits the subject that well.

I've also been working on my lifewriting for the ECA, a short piece on telling my four year old daughter her father had died. It's no funnier than it sounds, but it's been interesting talking about it to Sophie from her vast life experience at 23. It sparked a clear out and I realised how much crap from my past - mementos, ornaments, books, etc. I was holding onto because they connect to the past. My husband, also widowed but much more recently, does the same, so it's definitely time for a good review of what we actually need to keep and a chance to declutter. It's like there are layers of memories with everything, that are as obvious as the dust, once you move them. I will take the old furniture to Winchester and either dump it or pass it on to Sophie. Meanwhile I'm full of dust and memories and my dreams are emotional and scary, full of dying people and sadness. To make matters worse, we seem to have a wood mouse loose in the house, that comes into our room on its travels at night! I don't mind mice but it's the not knowing where it is that bothers me! It spooked Sophie the other night, up late watching supernatural, all alone, except for the mouse... I don't know who was more scared. Rodents are a major issue with this house, despite four over-fed and idle cats.

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