Tuesday, 27 March 2012

Now I have to be patient

I'm not a patient person. Now the book is off with the agent, I have to sit tight and see what she thinks. I like to have things to be getting on with, so I've had a little play with book 2. My biggest problem is the third POV character - is a garden. I'm not sure I can pull this off, but here's my very first draft (complete with typos, probably) of the first scene from the garden's POV.
The garden waits. It has forgotten what it waits for, and guards against, but it waits and guards anyway. It twitches out a few lime green nettle shoots, and brambles clench, searching for unwary rabbits.
Paths wind between shrubs with names like ‘Bottle Top Silverleaf’ and ‘Serpent Bush’ (variety argentia x ballistica), many unknown to modern science. A lone rhododendron has been harried into the shadow of the wall, ostracised by the native plants, its branches defending itself against attacks by blackthorn and a spiteful Pyracanthus. 
Apple and plum trees tease local children with fat fruit, hanging just out of reach over the wall, as if tempting them to try their footing between the shamble of stones. They always fall. Once, many seasons ago, a child died when the slab of limestone atop the wall slid after his tumbling body, and crushed his skull. Now the fruit goes unpicked, prey only to the crows, who grow fat and unmolested around the house, nesting between the chimneys, hiding behind its shattered windows.
And everywhere, the Elders, children of the great Elder mother, bang in the middle of the acre garden, defended on all sides by her progeny, shedding fat, black tears every autumn for the loss of the Witch.
It was easy to move Jack and Sadie up there, and their voices are much clearer now I know them so well. Taking characters from one book into another is new for me, and I like the familiarity, and it helps me develop the main character (MC). My biggest problem with first drafts is the MC is often a bit shadowy compared to everyone else. This time Jack is easy to write, I'm 2000 words in today. Hopefully, the tension of waiting will spur me on to write more!  


  1. Wow, that extract really drew me in! I actually felt a little disorientated when it stopped :D

  2. Good luck, and I loved the snippet!

  3. Thanks Beth, Glynis! I get lost in the creepy places in my head. The burned out house is even worse, I could virtually smell it!